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Child labour workshops now open!
Dear Chaser fans,
We are always on the lookout for new exciting ways to grow our business and our community. As such we are excited to announce the Chaser’s after school child labour classes!
That’s right, thanks to a small grant from the Morrison government, we will be launching our very own child sweatshop workshop. At the program your kids can learn plenty of real world skills and help the economy by putting the future generation in charge of heavy machinery.
The kids will get to experience the exciting opportunities that come from an honest day’s hard work with a wide range of classes, meaning any child can work basically any job and make a few cents an hour while doing so!
Of course we will be starting with the basics and getting kids driving forklifts, before moving onto bigger things like steamrollers and wrecking balls.
If construction isn’t your child’s thing, don't worry we have more programs they can try out. The Prime Minister has given us a long list of jobs that need filling.
To help with the food shortage we will be launching a program to get Toddlers behind the wheel of trucks, they are going to love the fun of the horn and the highway.
If you have a particularly adventurous child we have many opportunities for your kids to explore the world piloting jets and helicopters. We also have a few new tanks in need of drivers.
If all that sounds a bit dangerous for you, don’t worry, we are also looking for children to help out at the PCR clinics, they are extremely short staffed at the moment.
Now, we do understand some of you might be hesitant about leaving your kids to be looked after by the Chaser. No need to worry, we will be putting some kids in charge of supervising the kids as well.
John Delmenico
Sweatshop Manager
The Chaser
P.S. To go alongside our 'The Chaser's War Stories' month on the podcast where we relive our favourite moments from the War on Everything, we have also brought back the old 'Taking the Piss' T-shirt design as part of our collaboration with Lonely Kids Club. Click here to buy one!
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