Violence and murder are bad. Pretty much.

Dear Citizen,

As your Prime Minister, I’m here to tell you that violence and murder are always bad. Pretty much most of the time, anyway.

A lot of people want me to condemn the protesters in Melbourne who called for the murder of Daniel Andrews. But who am I to judge? Not satisified with changing the name of our favourite cheese, now the PC brigade now want to cancel political assassinations. Cancel culture is out of control.

I mean, I’d be lying if I told you that anyone who says that I’m not against murder and violence said that I wasn’t untruthful in disagreeing with them. I can’t be much clearer than that.

My point is that sometimes you must look at the broader picture. Just because something is bad doesn’t mean good things that can’t stem from that bad thing.

For example, just because calling for murder is bad doesn’t mean that people who call for murder aren’t going to vote. And it would be a huge waste for that vote to go to someone who, for example, thinks that calling for murder is unequivocally bad. Instead, surely the most democratic outcome is that people who call for murder and violence against our elected leaders send their vote to me, seeing as I’m less likely to disagree with them. That’s just how democracy works!
And anyway, at the end of the day. It’s about free speech. 
We are very lucky to have free speech in this country. In other countries, leaders would shoot citizens for talking to the government in the way that some Australians have been talking to me lately. But not in this country! How good is freedom, huh?!

MERCH AND SHOWS

While I've got you here, I should let you know that Charles Firth, Mark Humphries, Jenna Owen, Victoria Zerbst and James Schloeffel are all touring their free speech around Australia (well, specifically Gosford, Newcastle, Canberra, Wollongong, Penrith, Sydney and Melbourne). Buy tickets here.

Also, the good fellows at The Chaser's Shop have made a spectacular range of beach towels, books and Christmas cards. Many of them have me on them, so they must be good. As you know, I’m a big fan of heading off to the beach during a national crisis, and with bushfire season approaching, it’s important to stock up on as many beach towels as possible. 

First up, why don't you buy a Greetings from Bondi coronavirus beach towel?



If you'd prefer something that has me in it, you could try a couple of designs that I myself, Scott Morrison, appear in. The Scott Morrison Inaction Figure beach towel, for example:



Or, the original Greetings from Hawaii Scott Morrison beach towel.



Plus of course, there's the Chaser Annual 2021 with my mate Christian Porter, clearing out his desk, on the back cover.



Oh, and I should mention that The Chaser has also released a NOB Bank T-Shirt to go with their NOB Bank videos, which highlights how pro-fossil fuel NAB is. How good is greenwashing, eh?!




Yours somewhat truthfully,
Scott Morrison
Prime Minister of Australia

WAR ON 2021 LIVE SHOW

Our end of year live show "The War on 2021" is on across NSW and ACT, and most venues are now at 100%, so there are extra tickets for sale, even at venues that were previously sold out!  PLUS OUR MELBOURNE SHOW IS HAPPENING. Hurry - not many tickets left to that one.

November 24 - Central Coast Laycock Theatre - Book Now

November 25 - Newcastle City Hall, Concert Hall - Book Now

November 30 - Canberra Theatre - Book Now

December 2 - Wollongong IMB Theatre - Book Now

December 8 - Penrith, The Joan - Book Now

December 9 - Sydney, Enmore Theatre - Book Now

December 11 - Melbourne, Athenaeum Theatre - Book Now

PODCAST IS NOW DAILY
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MERCHANDISE
Check out our quality range of merchandise at the Chaser Shop. Plus if you're into wearing clothes, we've collaborated with ethical manufacturer Lonely Kids Club on a new line of merch and Minister Potatohead Track Pants. Check them out. Especially popular is the Chaser Hoodie.