We will prevail
Dear Reader,
You may have heard by now that the NSW Government almost collapsed this week because the loopy, left-wing nut jobs in the NSW Liberal Party had a bong too many and tried to deny people the perfectly reasonable right to murder koalas.
If you haven't heard about it, let me quickly explain. For many years, the political agenda in NSW has been held hostage by koalas who selfishly insist on living in trees. The thing about trees is that they're a huge bore. But to koalas, it's all about trees, trees, trees and trees. It's like trees are the only thing that matters to a koala.
Frankly -- I don't understand why koalas get any attention at all. As a species, they're about to become extinct. I'm sorry, but if they can't even survive as a species, they should hardly get carte-blanche on deciding environmental law in NSW.
City-folk think animals like koalas, quokkas and wombats are "adorable" and "part of our natural ecosystem", but if you live in the real-world, you know how ridiculous that is. Wombats alone destroy more bumper bars each year than any other animal. Ute insurance premiums would plummet if we got rid of them.
And have you ever smelt a singed koala? That stink is anything but "natural". With scientists predicting more bushfires in years to come, the last thing we need is hordes of singed koalas roaming around the country, stinking up our valuable farmland.
Now, some people say that these new laws won't stop us from chopping down trees to farm. Routine land clearing for farming purposes will be unaffected by the new koala protection laws.
So yeah, but it's the PRINCIPLE of the matter. Ordinary, everyday farmers should be allowed murder koalas. That's part of what our forefathers were granted when they stole this land.
It's a principle that the NSW National Party is willing to almost go to the wall on, and then back down at the last minute when they realise their salaries will suffer. But rest assured, this is not the last salvo in this battle. Until Australia's constitution has been amended to recognise the right to kill koalas, we will not rest.
We will prevail.
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THE SHOT
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Charles Firth
Managing Editor
The Chaser
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